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"New Works - Room 1"


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The titles of these rooms are a bit misleading (can you find it in your heart to forgive me?). Some of the poems here aren't actually very new at all. In fact, one of them- "The Soldiers" is one of the very first ones I ever wrote. For many years it was lost but not very long ago I found the original newspaper article from my little hometown newspaper where it was published. The other poems span a time frame of several years, but all of them were written after I finally decided that "A Different Reality" was finished.

The dates are indicated on most of the poems as well a few "tributes" to certain people along the way. Again, you'll find Michelle mentioned, along with a very special lady named Sharon who is now my wife. Also mentioned are Ray Guy, the very best friend a person could ever have, and "Tsunami"- a band I wrote a few songs for several years ago.

OK, enough of the personal stuff. On with the show...

or...if you prefer...

Back to The Cabin or Back to "A Different Reality"




Index
A Father's Eyes Angel's Prayer Another Empty Glass
Behind the Wall Between the Dreams Choosy Beggars
Cry For Sanity Friends Heaven and Hell
Hidden Gardens If Only In the Shadows
A Song for Jennifer Just Another Writer Lines On A Page
Love Forsaken Magic Lady Michael's Star
My Friend Mystery Navy Blues



A Father's Eyes
to index


Lying there beneath the covers
Of your childhood dreams,
Your world is filled with wonder,
Of what it all could mean.

Lost within your new found wisdom,
You sometimes feel alone,
Even in the gentle comfort,
Of your familiar home.

Feeling like you're not connected,
But do you realize,
You are held within the safety,
Of your father's eyes?

Every breath you take is cherished,
And every word you say.
In his heart he smiles in silence,
As you find your way.

There are many worlds to conquer,
But they're all inside.
Every fear you overpower
Gives him a sense of pride.

You see him as a distant figure,
A star within your skies,
But he holds you close within him,
The sparkle in his eyes.

A garden of his own creation,
A flower of his soul.
He tends the beauty deep within you,
Willing it to grow.

Holding back his tears of anguish,
When he feels your pain,
Being there to lead you forward,
To the knowledge gained.

Every road you'll ever travel,
He'll be by your side,
With a light to pierce the shadows,
From his loving eyes.

He's the lighthouse on the shoreline,
As you ride the waves,
On an ocean deep and stormy,
With the love he gave.

Often tossed about and battered,
By the violent seas,
But you sail along with hope
For soft realities.

Calmer ports where you can settle,
Soothe your mournful cries.
Seeking warmth you still remember,
In your father's eyes.

He'll be there to hold you tightly,
As you fall asleep,
Smooth the blankets of compassion
Around the dreams you keep.

Sing to you his lullabies.
In your darkest nights.
Hold your hand as you give birth
To the poems you write,

Like the children of his soul,
He'll watch them as they fly.
Guiding them on angels wings,
With a father's eyes.

27-April-1996

Angel's Prayer
to index


Of Life and Love and all I've known
Within this mortal world,
There lives an Angel forged of gold,
Whose seen my dreams unfurled.

She stands in silent witness to
The pain within my soul,
And guides my troubled thoughts with care
Where peaceful waters flow.

Beyond the darkened visions of a past
With soft regrets,
To places never known before,
Where future hope reflects.

A mirror of my inner self,
A twin of my desires,
This Angel holds a candle tight,
To light the hidden fires.

She weaves a golden cord around
The fissures of my heart,
To bind the fractured dreams I've held
With love and gentle thoughts.

Of every trusted friend I've known,
And every love before,
She's given more than anyone,
And asks for nothing more.

The beauty of her essence
Is a garden of delights,
Adding color and enchantment,
To the dark and lonely nights.

Her words are softened petals,
That caress my deepest fears,
Her soul a cup of friendship
To collect my many tears.

Her eyes are pools of comfort,
And have shared my deepest dreams,
Like stars within the heavens,
Casting light upon the scenes.

Her voice, a song of laughter,
Giving joy to troubled hearts,
In rhythm to the power,
That united souls impart.

Her love a peaceful blanket,
To relieve the lonely chills,
A warmth that knows no boundaries,
The empty spaces filled.

These gifts my Angel sent to me,
A message strong and true,
Of friendship, hope, and thankfulness,
And peaceful thoughts renewed.

This Angel's Prayer I give to her,
Though less than she deserves,
I offer her the tenderness,
Held close within these words:

"Thank God for you and all you've done,
You're with me every day,
A special kind of friend you are,
To walk with me this way.

And every path I tread upon,
I'll keep you by my side,
My beautiful reminder of,
The place where faith resides.

Where truth and love are joined as one,
Upon a higher plane,
And voices speak of love we share,
With sweet and soft refrain.

I pray you'll sense the happiness,
You've added to my soul.
The colors of the rainbow pale,
Beside your golden glow.

I promise I will hold you close,
Through all the dreams we seek,
And every breath I've yet to breathe,
You'll feel upon your cheek.

And should we ever reach the stars,
We'll hold them in our hands,
Like diamonds of remembrance,
To light our earthly plans.

We'll bask within their crystal glow,
And walk the sands of time,
Side by side and close to heart,
We'll share the dreams we find.

I'll treasure every moment spent,
Within your celestial wings,
And know I'm safe amongst your thoughts,
Whatever the future brings.

And every time you're lonely,
I'll be there to comfort you,
I pray that you will understand,
That I'm your Angel too."

12/09/95

For Michelle- my co-guardian Angel

Another Empty Glass
to index


It's been twelve long years and counting.
Since the last time that I sat down at this bar.
Guess that long and winding highway,
May have carried me a little bit too far.

All the things that meant so much to her,
Must have meant a whole lot more to me.
But I guess it doesn't matter now,
Cause our future's fading fast to history.

So fill it up again my friend,
It's nice to see a face I used to know.
We can talk about the old days,
When I thought I had no better place to go.

Way back then I was so lonely,
Thought I'd lost the girl I tried so hard to find,
I found another waiting for me,
And I put those lonely thoughts so far behind.

Then the years went by so quickly,
Had some kids and went to school to learn a trade.
Never thinking that the day I left,
May have been the worst mistake I ever made.

Now my life has made a circle,
And I find myself back where it all began.
Though the years have changed me greatly,
I'm staring through an empty glass again.

So won't you take a drink to loneliness,
Go ahead and have another drink on me.
And when you gaze into that empty glass,
Don't say a word, we both know just what you will see.

All the plans you make, and friends you meet,
Never make much of a difference anyway.
And the cost of giving all for love,
Is a higher price than any man should pay.

Yes I know it's time to close it down,
But the night's still young although I'm feeling old.
And I know my credit must be good,
Cause I paid a lot for all those dreams I sold.

So won't you share just one more drink with me,
Then we'll talk a while and I'll be going home.
Another night, another empty glass,
But this time I don't want to cry alone.

24-Jan-93
("Sequel" to Empty Glass- from "A Different Reality")

Behind The Wall
to index

Michelle A. Bartley ((with related verses from "A Different Reality"))

How many have hurt you,
Slashing at your heart?
Leaving without a single clue,
As you watched them depart?

((Now you're all out of clues,
With nothing to lose,
But the pain and thoughts behind you.))

Left you bleeding, alone and cold,
To nurture fatal blows,
Thinking of the dreams you sold,
Where tears, like rivers flow.

((When the evening wind is blowing,
And you're out there in the cold,
You know your debts are paid
From all the dreams you sold.))

When pain becomes unbearable,
And everything you caress,
Proves to be intolerable,
While expecting nothing less.

((Will I ever lose the feeling?
Pain so hard to bear.
No one sees the emptiness,
Would they even care?))

So many times you've loved in vain,
Though useless as it may be,
You heal a bit, then try again,
In pursuit of sincerity.

((All your life you have tried in vain,
Your light was shining through the falling rain.
Lost your heart - and you felt the pain,
Then you went insane.))

Always hoping for someone,
Who will be devoted and real,
To walk with underneath the sun,
And savor the things you feel.

((Mirror , Mirror what is wrong?
I've been waiting much too long.
Waiting for a love to share,
Now I have no time to spare.
Even while I write this song,
I'm feeling like I don't belong.
I've been searching everywhere,
Hoping for someone to care.))

A constant quest and yearning,
A pacing in your soul,
A life that's spent in learning,
On what can make you whole.

((Don't let life pass you by,
Those bridges that you're burning,
Instead you should be learning,
How not to say good-bye.))

But soon you come to understand,
No matter how you try,
You'll never get that winning hand,
So let your passions die.

((Throw away the faces,
Say you understand.
Show your secret places,
Play your winning hand.))

Another brick fixed in the wall,
A little bit more mortar,
A few supports so it won't fall,
Then everything's in order.

((And when the worst of it hits you,
Try not to stagger and fall.
The wolves are behind you
And quick to remind you
You should have let love build a wall.))

Build it solid, erect and high,
Make certain it's secured,
So nobody can hear you cry,
Or voice a single word.

((I've spent some long years crying,
And standing in the rain,
To keep the world from knowing
My life was lived in pain.))

Ensure there is a covering,
To block out rays of light,
Await for demons hovering,
Within the desolate nights.

((In dreams so dark where demons walk,
A phantom turns a key.
Unlocking doors within my mind
Which hide insanities.))

Hold all your feelings deep inside,
Do not let others see,
Maintain a distance long and wide,
And do not deal with me.

((Is it worth the chance to try,
Before the chance has passed us by,
To forget the dreams and settle for our pride?
We have given all we can,
And we may never understand,
If the dreams were lost or just too deep inside.))

Close your eyes, and shut your ears,
Contrive I don't exist,
Latch your heart and seal your mind,
And live within the mist.

((The cold wind whispers softly,
To a lonely, aching heart.
Your memories gather 'round me,
Like shadows in the mist.
They trigger deep emotions,
I think of our last kiss.))

Endure within the world you made,
So distant from my love,
Notice your heart just slowly fade,
With no light from above.

((Distant days all fade away,
Unsure of their reality.
And all the dreams that mattered most,
Not worth the trouble or the cost.))

I will not let all that take place,
Oh yes, you may recede,
I will stand bravely in your face,
Your aching heart I'll feed.

((Let's find another mountain now,
And join our hearts as one.
Our souls will come together,
As we touch the morning sun.))

I'll chip away at all the blocks,
And you can surely bet,
I'll turn them into little rocks,
With each one that you set.

((Play the game.
Take another name.
I'll place my bet on you.
I've done my part,
Offered my heart.
My future is up to you.))

I'll destroy that ceiling part,
You worked so hard to build,
And every corner of your heart,
With my love will be filled.

((The sky is growing darker
As sunset colors fade.
We'll build a fire between us,
No need to be afraid.))

I'll curl up warmly in your heart,
And nestle deep inside,
I'll treasure the most subtle part,
Which you try so hard to hide.

((Your touch still warms me deep inside,
My soul is in your hands.
Your love keeps pouring over me,
Like waves upon the sand.))

I'll hold your trembling essence,
Until you feel protected,
I'll bathe you in my incense,
And you'll never feel neglected.

((Keep holding on to me babe,
Your dreams can still come true.
Keep reaching out to touch me,
I'll keep on loving you.))

I'll kiss away the salty tears,
From your tear stained cheek,
And pull you closer to my breast,
When you're feeling weak.

((We held each other softly,
Beneath the starry skies,
And I kissed away your tears,
While they sparkled in your eyes.))

And hopefully within my love,
You'll find peace and harmony,
For only in this pure embrace,
Will our lonely hearts be free.

((You see,
How much your smile means to me.
You've given my life a new meaning.
The key,
To setting my lonely heart free,
Is holding you close while I'm dreaming.))

Between The Dreams
to index


Beyond the distant memories,
Of a world we once had shared.
I searched for deeper meanings,
Through the dreams that took me there.

You lay between the spaces,
Of the dreams I had each night.
In silence cloaked with darkness,
Far removed from conscious sight.

But in that gentle darkness,
You remained a shining star.
A tiny point of light,
That traveled with me very far.

And all the years I held that light,
Within my longing heart,
Though tortured by your memory
As we drifted far apart.

The months turned into years
That led me on my chosen way,
As the mist of time gone by
Began to shroud those golden days.

Still there within the haze
Your image floated 'cross my mind.
And all the love I found
Was less than what I left behind.

Our lives become a journey
We must follow to the end.
And paths we chance upon
Can sometimes circle back again.

The dreams that don't come true
Become the rocks we stumble on,
But sometimes still we find the dream
That leads the way back home.

Between those dreams unfinished
I kept my eyes upon the glow.
That light of distant memories,
Of a love I once had known.

And then one day I realized
My dream could still come true.
So I set my sight upon that star,
That led me back to you.

07/22/96

For Sharon- My guiding star

Choosy Beggars
to index


If beggars could be choosers
What would the beggars choose?
For those who've lost most everything
There's little left to loose.

Would they choose to be a rich man
With cars and diamond rings?
Or would they laugh at those who pray
For all those foolish things?

Or choose to be a working man,
And slave from dusk to dawn,
And break their backs to pay the bills
For things they'll never own.

Or would they all be actors,
On a stage beneath the lights,
Pretending to be someone else
In the lonely game of life?

Or maybe they'd be artists
Painting pictures of their dreams,
And hoping that the critics
Could tell them what they mean.

If beggars could be choosers,
What would the beggars choose?
For if they're left with nothing
There is nothing else to lose.

Perhaps they'd all be judges
Passing laws across the land,
And fight for rights and justice,
For the common fellow man.

Or maybe they'd be doctors
Searching for the final cure,
To save mankind forever
Keep him safe and sane and pure.

Or would they all be preachers,
With salvation up for sale?
Just send a small donation
And save your soul from hell.

They might choose to all be farmers,
Growing food to feed the world,
Bringing hope for life and laughter
To some starving boy or girl.

If beggars could be choosers,
What would the beggars choose?
For those who want for nothing
Have everything to lose.

They'd choose to be forgiven
For the sins their eyes conceal.
They'd choose to be remembered
For the wisdom they reveal.

They'd choose to have some dignity,
A little peace of mind.
They'd choose to have you smile at them
As you handed them a dime.

They'd choose to have a family
Or at least a friend who cared.
They'd choose to spend just one long day
Not lonely, sad or scared.

If beggars could be choosers,
They'd be like you and I,
They'd choose to have some choices,
As their time goes quickly by.

08/25/93


Written for Ray Guy, my cosmic brother- by special request

Cry For Sanity*
to index


Our time is running out
There is no place to hide.
All the people scream and shout,
And think of suicide.

Acid rain is falling down
We're drowning in the tide.
Toxic waste is underground,
Don't try to go outside.

Can't you hear the children cry?
What will we leave for them?
Have you lost your sanity?
We're coming to the end.

Looking for some peace of mind,
Our leaders turn their head,
Are they just to blind to see
Where all their lies have led?

We keep calling,
There's nobody home,
Where are you?
You keep stalling,
The seeds of war are sown,
Where are you?

Time to put them in their place,
And make our voices heard.
Have to make them understand,
We've got to spread the word.

There is no time to hesitate,
It's such a fragile world.
We can plant the seeds of peace,
A flag to be unfurled.

Give the kids a chance at life,
The future's calling now.
Everyone must make a stand,
We'll show the leaders how.

Make them see our point of view,
They've got to understand.
It's only up to me and you,
The future's in our hands.

We're still calling,
Is anybody home,
Where are you?
The sky is falling,
The seeds of war have grown,
Where are you?

By: Alan W. Goodson and Ray Guy
04-July-1989

*originally written in Oakland, Ca. as "protest song" for Tsunami

Friends
to index


There's a boy whose lonely journey,
Led him onward in the night,
Far removed from earthly pleasures,
To a softly glowing light.

Not aware of subtle consequence,
Beneath his simple rhymes,
To a place where dreams were gathered
Undisturbed by space and time.

There's a girl who spoke to angels,
On a lake beside the falls.
With her visions tightly sheltered,
By her solitary walls.

Built to save her from the damage,
She perceived within her world.
She forgot the gentle freedom,
That her words had once unfurled.

Two alone within the darkness,
Of their ordinary lives.
As they healed the wounds created,
By their separate demon's knives.

Still a passion burned within them,
And it set their souls on fire,
With a need to find the meaning,
To their deepest heart's desire.

Something waited for them somewhere,
Just beyond their mortal reach,
In a realm beyond their visions,
They could hear it's quiet beseech.

What becomes of souls imprisoned,
By the chains of life's regrets?
Who decides the paths they walked upon,
Or the dreams they can't forget?

Is something hidden in the dark,
In shadows of the heart,
That whispers to the deafened ear,
Of secrets to impart?

Is life deprived of meaning,
When the answers can't be found?
Is loneliness the silence,
Of a heart that makes no sound?

So many burning questions,
With the answers never clear.
It filled their minds with wonder,
As it fed their lonely fear.

On a quiet enchanted evening,
Fate became their soulful guide,
Smiling wisely from it's refuge,
As it watched their worlds collide.

And now they walk together,
Far apart but hand in hand.
With dreams and words to link them,
As they try to understand.

The questions still unanswered,
But closer to the light,
Impassioned by connections,
Their dreams again in sight.

Two mystic friends who bonded,
Through dreams they shared as one,
But now their destination,
Will not be reached alone.

03/03/96

For my cosmic twin and confidante- Michelle

Heaven and Hell
to index


So...so you thought you could tell
Heaven from Hell,
What did you think you would feel?
What did the darkness reveal,
How many dreams did you sell?

And now...now you're out on your own,
Trying to find your way home,
Can you find your way back,
Through the silent attacks,
Can you do it alone?

Out on your own,
A million miles from your home,
Can you do it alone?
Can you find your way home?

No one knows who you are,
You have traveled so far,
Trying to reach for the stars,
No matter how near or how far.

Here...here you sit by the fire,
Consumed by a distant desire,
Faith in what you believe,
What you try to perceive,
While your dreams take you higher.

How...how do you deal with the fear?
When every day is a year,
Every moment that dies,
Is your life passing by,
Can you see your way clear?

Lost there alone,
A million miles from your home,
Are you still all alone?
Is there anyone home?

No one knows where you are,
Did you fight in the war,
Lose your mind in a bar,
Or forget who you are?

Dream...dreams of love in the night,
Faith in hope's second sight,
In a future foretold,
Do you ever grow old?
Do the memories bite?

Deep...deeper into your soul,
How far down does it go?
Do you toss on the waves,
Messages nobody saves,
Are they lost in the flow?

Distant voice on the phone,
A million miles from your home,
'Cross the desert you roam,
Do you cross it alone?

No one knows what you are,
All they see are the scars,
And a door left ajar,
To a life so bizarre.

When...when will you ever see,
What you thought it would be,
Is it all in your mind,
Or the dreams that you find,
In your own destiny?

So...so you thought you could tell,
Heaven from Hell,
Did you find your way back,
Or fall through the cracks,
Of the soft tolling bell?

Are you ever alone,
Sitting cold by the phone,
Trying to find your way home,
Can you make it alone?

Do you know who you are?
You have traveled so far,
Dressed in feathers and tar,
Wounded deep in the war.

05/27/96

Hidden Gardens
to index


A world with simple pleasures seems so hard to comprehend,
So many doors I knock upon, but few will let me in.
And in my search for answers to the questions that I find,
Sometimes I get entangled with the dreams I left behind.

We sail the oceans of our minds to shores both near and far,
Adrift upon our inner tides, to find out who we are.
But if I should become the person I was meant to be,
How would I know that I had reached my final destiny?

Would there be someone waiting there to hold me in their arms,
To dry the tears I shed and keep me safe and sane and warm?
Or would I find myself alone still searching for the truth,
When all the dust of paths I walked has settled on my youth?

So many walls I build against the furies of the night,
And every tear I shed can add a layer to it's height.
And then one day I find I've nearly locked myself inside,
Afraid to let the walls come down, I've found a place to hide.

Protecting what I hold so close, afraid to let it show,
My deepest hidden gardens with the flowers of my soul.
Protective of their beauty while I tend to them with care,
While dreaming of another soul whose beauty I can share.

At times I step beyond the walls, but still I lock the door,
So no one enters while I'm gone in search of something more.
But all I see around me are the walls that others build,
A world of brick and mortar with the doors so tightly sealed.

And in the streets abandoned, I am forced to walk alone,
In shadows of discomfort, 'twixt the castles made of stone.
The darkened alleys hold no clues to what may lie within,
And on the air I smell the stench of every mortal sin.

So on I walk through streets aflame with fires of doubt and fear,
With all the wasted love I spent reflecting in my tears.
While ashes fall upon my heart, to muffle every beat,
So others never hear the sound, like drums of soft defeat.

Sometimes I hear the footsteps of another weary soul,
Who chanced to leave the shelter where their hidden gardens grow.
But when my eyes have fallen on their sad and empty shell,
I only hear the echoes of another's private hell.

I talk awhile to be polite and pass the time of day,
Then nod my head to say goodbye, and go my separate way.
For all along I sensed that nothing more was meant to be,
Their walls are much too high and they don't offer me the key.

A city full of strangers huddle quietly at their doors,
Afraid of my intentions, so my knocks they still ignore.
In silent desperation, holding tightly to their pain,
Their fear of losing everything forsakes what they could gain.

Why can't we let the walls come down, to set our spirits free?
We're all the same and in the end, that's all we'll ever be.
The tears we cry, the love we need, the essence of our heart,
Why must we hide behind the walls that keep us all apart?

Imagine for a moment, if we had the wings to fly,
And every hidden garden was exposed before our eyes.
We'd see the awesome beauty from an angel's point of view,
A rainbow brought to earth with every color bright and true.

A glowing magic carpet joining every heart's desire,
The palette of our soul's intent to take us ever higher.
Above the walls of fear we build to hold us safe within,
Then maybe we could share the keys to let the others in.

05/17-18/96

If Only
to index


If only we could walk amongst the dreams within the night,
And hold our gentle passions when we wake at morning light,
We'd find some comfort in the day and hold it deep within,
To keep us safe from lonely fears 'till we could dream again.

If only we could find a place to lay our minds to rest,
Where we could feel the warmth of love in every whispered breath,
We'd surely conquer time and space for all eternity,
And solve the riddles of the heart with all it's mysteries.

If only we could soar above the mountain peaks so high,
And fly abreast of eagles through the early morning sky,
We'd capture rays of sunlight on the tips of spreading wings,
And paint a glowing rainbow that would make the angels sing.

If only we could build a bridge to join the separate worlds,
Of every soul who walks alone in search of dreams unfurled,
We'd bring them all together so their thoughts would be as one,
And drown within the magic of the paradise to come.

If only we could see beyond the visions of today,
And touch the distant future that is sure to come our way,
We'd light a candle on a path for everyone to see,
So they could be the person now, that they were meant to be.

If only we could find a way to catch the flowing tears,
Of every broken heart we've known throughout the many years,
We'd scatter them amongst the clouds to form a peaceful rain,
To fall upon the flowers so the tears aren't shed in vain.

If only there was something more that we could understand,
About the dreams we've often held within our trembling hands,
We'd touch the light that every soul must someday walk towards,
And guide them in their journey with the rhythm of our words.

If only you were here with me, or I was there with you,
I'm sure we'd find a million things that we could surely do,
To make the world a better place for others yet to find,
So maybe they would also try to leave some love behind.

In tribute to Levon Parker- may you rest in peace

In The Shadows
to index


Rain is falling,
The future's calling,
In silent wonder,
I hear the thunder.

Sometimes, I'm searching for some answers,
In this passion play, I'm just a lonely dancer.
The world turns, a new day is dawning,
The past sits in the shadows like a warning.

Somewhere there's a book that stands open,
With all the plans made and promises broken.
A page turns, in silence while I'm dreaming,
In a strange world where time has no meaning.

In the shadows,
Someone's standing.
Patient waiting
Undemanding.

Rain is falling,
Voices calling.
A new tomorrow,
I must follow.

Many road left behind me not taken,
Many dreams left in darkness forsaken,
Like a candle forgotten, left burning,
When the flame dies there can be no returning.

Now a tide flows like waves of emotion,
Striking castles built next to the ocean.
And the walls crumble into the blue sea,
Leaving nothing but sand castle memories.

In the shadows,
Someone's standing.
Patient waiting,
Undemanding.

Rain is falling,
The future's calling.
In silent wonder,
I hear the thunder.

There is darkness ahead and behind me,
Where the echoes of time often find me.
I am touched by a whisper of sorrow,
For yesterdays that were once my tomorrows.

1994

A Song For Jennifer
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It seems like yesterday
When I last saw your face,
A bright spark of hope
In this darkened place.

A look of innocence
Like I've never seen,
Then the spark was gone
You put an end to your dream.

A season has passed, since you went away,
And I walk the grounds, where we once played.
You're home now, you suffer pain no more,
But the memory of you, in my heart, is stored.

In this world gone mad, no one heard your voice,
So in silence you dealt with your final choice.
And in silence you live, in my dreams of the past,
And no light can shine through the shadow you cast.

Were the questions you had
Just too hard to ask,
Or were the answers you found
Wearing too many masks?

You might have found shelter
From the cold falling rain.
But too much was lost
And nothing was gained.

And now that it's over, and now that you're gone,
I have all your memories, but still I'm alone.
The fate that you followed, left no room for me,
So I toast you in sorrow, may your spirit be free.

Dedicated to all the lost souls...and the ones they leave behind

Just Another Writer
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Well I'm just another writer,
In this lonely passion play,
And I know I've said it all before,
But I have some more to say.

I could talk about the reasons,
That our love was meant to be,
I could tell you all the dreams I've had
Or what you mean to me.

I could tell you that I need you,
And I want you in my life,
I could ask you to believe in me,
Or just to be my wife.

I could try to make you understand,
The man that I've become,
Or to beg for your forgiveness,
For some things I've said or done.

But it wouldn't make a difference,
'Cause you love me anyway.
I can hear it in the way you talk,
And everything you say.

So I'll just sit here and write for you,
And try to make it rhyme,
Like the rhythms of our hearts that called
Us both through space and time.

And I'll think about the beauty that
I see within your smiles,
All the special gifts you've given me,
'Cross the long and lonely miles.

And I'll hold you tight within my thoughts,
'Till I hold you in my arms.
While I try to touch you in my dreams,
To keep you safe and warm.

I'll remember all the years gone by,
How I kept you in my soul,
How the special love you shared with me,
Never lost it's golden glow.

I'll recall the times I thought of you,
In a million memories,
How I never stopped believing,
You were meant to be with me.

And I'll love you from a distance,
'Till the distance disappears,
Then I'll love you every moment,
If I live a million years.

But still it won't be long enough,
To tell you how I feel,
About the dreams you've made come true,
Or how you've made them real.

'Cause I'm just another writer,
With too many things to say,
And I'll never find the words I need,
To explain those things away.

I could say how much I miss you,
How I've wanted to be there,
How it hurts to be away from you,
How it doesn't seem too fair.

Or talk about the future,
All the things we've yet to find,
When our bodies are together,
Like we are within our minds.

Replay those stolen moments,
That we shared not long ago,
How everything was perfect,
How our love so freely flowed.

But nothing I could say would be,
Much different than before,
And all that I could say to you,
Would tell you nothing more.

I'm just another writer.
But every word was true,
So I'll say the ones that matter most,
Forever, I'll love you.

04/06/96


Lines On A Page
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Lines on my face
And lines on a page,
Tell separate silent stories
Of one man's silent rage.

So funny how it happens
And sad how it becomes,
When two dreams joined together
Turn into separate ones,

And two hearts once in rhythm
Start playing different songs,
And no one cares or wonders
Who was right or who was wrong.

When shadows cross my vision
Like clouds across the sun,
The dreams grow old and wither
And another day is done.

But someone, out there somewhere,
Once said, when love is gone
What once you sought together,
You now must seek alone,

For happiness is fleeting
And it leaves a fiery tail.
You move on ever forward
Or you burn in fiery hell.

And all the years you suffered,
And all the tears you cried,
Mean nothing to the future
Or all the dreams that died.

So in your selfish wisdom,
You hold on to the key,
And lock the doors behind you,
As you struggle to be free.

It's just another cross road,
And just another choice,
And buried in your conscience
Is just another voice.

Another line upon my face,
Like bars set in a cage,
But slipping out between the bars
Are lines upon a page.

9-Jan-93

Love Forsaken
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In quiet desperation
So many lives are lived,
Too much has been forgiven
Too little left to give.

They gather in their sadness
Attracted by their pain,
Discuss the days adventures
And slowly go insane.

No more dreams to hope for
No more seeds to sow,
No one to go home to
And no place else to go.

And in their weaker moments
They hold each other tight,
No words of love are spoken,
Just voices in the night.

Then silence rules the evening
With nothing left to say.
Dawn touches the horizon
They go their separate ways.

What happened to the promise
Of love forever true?
What trampled through the garden
Where the rose of love once grew?

When life has lost it's meaning
And dreams are left to die,
Who profits in the aftermath
Of all the tears you cry?

The questions left unanswered
Burn deep within the soul
Of every heart left darkened
By a love that lost it's glow.

So nothing lasts forever
And nothing stays the same,
And lives are left to crumble
And no one takes the blame.

But does it even matter
Or should you shed a tear?
When love has been forsaken
There is nothing else to fear.

19-Sept-93

Magic Lady
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It was more than thirty years ago,
Back in nineteen fifty-five.
Another beat of life began,
A new born heart alive.

Not many thought her special then
But she had a lot of soul.
And no one knew what she'd become
Or how far she would go.

And in her eyes was harmony
Like never seen before.
It seems there was some magic there
That no one could ignore.

Some said she held a devil's curse,
This strange eyed little girl.
Your heart beat faster in her sight,
Your mind set in a whirl.

And when she smiled you felt a chill
Run up and down your spine.
And soon she was a part of you,
Embedded in your mind.

The years passed by and as she grew
Her fame spread far and wide.
So many souls she set aflame
No place was there to hide.

Her strength was greater every day,
She cast a magic spell.
The wise men said she'd surely bring
A special kind of hell.

Still others said she grew too fast,
And soon she'd have to die.
They saw her as a falling star,
A quick flash in the sky.

In spite of all, her life went on,
The world was not the same.
The youths had special faith in her
And millions called her name.

Her power spread around the globe,
To touch the young and old.
And many lives were changed by her,
They worshipped her with gold.

Some tried to take her for their own,
Her lovers they became.
And many died before their time
But she was not to blame.

Her love was there for all to share
Too much for just a few.
So thousands met to feel her heat,
When into town she flew.

Her voice is heard throughout the world,
A language known to all,
A mystery without a clue,
Enchanting is her call.

It's a hypnotizing rhythm,
That can touch your very soul.
She reaches deep inside you,
And we call her Rock and Roll.

10-Aug-1989

Michael's Star
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Another star was born,
Not so very long ago,
Now the heavens shine much brighter
With a special kind of glow.

And the light falls down upon you,
Who knew this special heart.
A beacon there to guide you,
Down below, so far apart.

The angels sing more sweetly,
Since they have an added voice,
God called him there to join them,
There could be no other choice.

A heart too large to be contained
Within this earthly realm,
So He reached out to bring it home,
And Michael went to Him.

The colors of the rainbow,
Seem to have a deeper hue,
A promise sent from heaven
That he'll wait right there for you.

And when your heart has gathered
All the light that it can hold,
You'll find yourself with Michael,
And your star will add it's glow.

Rest in peace Michael

My Friend
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So many roads we travel, that seem to have no end,
But the ones that really matter, are traveled with a friend.
A cosmic twin connected, with dreams much like our own,
Someone to stand beside us, when we may feel alone.

They wipe away the sadness, and dry the falling tears,
Fill our lives with laughter, and share our deepest fears.
They hold our hands to guide us, when we have lost our way,
And understand the things we feel, but find so hard to say.

A friend is like a flower, in the gardens of our soul,
With roots around our heart, needing only love to grow.
And in their simple beauty, we can find the things we need,
To make the garden grow by spreading out their tender seeds.

A shoulder we can lean on, when we are feeling weak,
They share our life's adventures, and all the dreams we seek.
A shelter from the wind and rain, a port in every storm.
A blanket we can wrap around, to keep us safe and warm.

A light within our darkest nights, on whom we can depend,
We hold a piece of heaven, when we have found a friend.
Someone to tell our secrets to, and hold them safe inside,
Someone who sees behind our walls, where we may often hide.

A person to believe in us, when no one seems to care,
Who'll listen to our problems, anytime or anywhere.
Someone who doesn't judge us, or pretend to understand,
Accepts us as we are without conditions or demands.

A friend will walk beside us, not in front or far behind,
Someone who sees us clearly, when others are so blind.
A person we can trust in, to be there when we call,
Who'll pick us up and dust us off, if we should ever fall.

And if our hearts should break, they'll hold it tight until it mends,
For there is nothing stronger than the bond between two friends.
And every word I've written has never felt so true,
I know because I've felt it all, by being friends with you.

For Amanda

Mystery
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In dreams encountered in the night,
I am you and you are me.
With visions shared by common sight,
Together we're a mystery.

The ribbons of the future dark,
And bows of separate pasts,
Combine to wrap our present hearts,
In the questions that we ask.

It defies our recollection,
Of a past we seem to share,
A mystic soul connection,
Beyond the mortal masks we wear.

Our friends bear poignant witness,
To a force not known before.
They seem to travel with us
As we open celestial doors.

Beyond our depth of knowledge,
Within our bonded souls,
We fearfully acknowledge,
There's something yet to know.

A story told in rhythm,
Connects our distant minds.
Poetic cataclysms,
Of what we need to find.

Beneath the inspiration,
That guide the words we write,
An aural satisfaction,
Pervades the silent nights.

It seems as if we're chosen,
To solve the mysteries,
Of other hearts found frozen,
In separate destinies.

11/12/95

For Michelle

Navy Blues
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We've been wandering,
We've been wandering so long.
We've been traveling,
We've been traveling alone.

It's been lonely,
It's been lonely on our own.
And we're so far,
Yes we're so far from home.

And we wonder,
Yes we wonder what it means.
Is it destiny,
Or are we just living in a dream,
Just living in a dream.

We play together,
We play together for you.
We have some feelings,
We have some feelings to get through.

When you listen,
When you listen, what do you hear?
Are there just questions,
Or is there an answer here?

We've been wondering,
We've been wondering,
We've been traveling,
We've been traveling,
Alone.

And if it's just a dream,
If it's just a dream,
Why does it feel,
Why does it feel,
Why does it feel,
So real?

1989
Written for "Tsunami"